{"id":1993,"date":"2024-02-09T18:23:57","date_gmt":"2024-02-09T18:23:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp.mun.ca\/studentblog\/?p=1993"},"modified":"2024-02-29T14:48:02","modified_gmt":"2024-02-29T14:48:02","slug":"overcoming-self-doubt-and-planning-for-success","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wp.mun.ca\/studentblog\/overcoming-self-doubt-and-planning-for-success\/","title":{"rendered":"Overcoming Self-doubt and Planning for Success"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

There are divergent views on success. Some say it\u2019s a product of hard work. Some say it\u2019s sheer luck. More recent schools of thought say it\u2019s a combination of both\u2013hard work and luck. That\u2019s well, true. But I believe every success story has something much more important: self-belief.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I recall grappling with my academics in my first year as a graduate student of French studies. Coming from an English-speaking country, I found myself literally swimming with sharks; coursemates who are mostly native French speakers. Intimidated by this, I began to wonder how I managed to get the funded admission in the first place. Memories of how hard I had worked to land the highly competitive graduate assistantship simply faded off. I unconsciously wrote myself off and began to look for other programs I could transfer to when push comes to shove.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It was so bad that after almost every class, I\u2019d wound up confused without a clear understanding of what was taught or discussed. To make matters worse, there were tons of books and course materials to be read. And since I was already frustrated, I could neither keep up nor catch up. So I kept winging it. My confidence dipped week on week as I got overwhelmed by this experience. Needless to say, my first semester results were incommensurable with my potential.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I knew I couldn\u2019t continue that way. I had to do something. I spent the two weeks holiday preceding the next semester figuring out the cause of this predicament. I pondered on what I did and what I didn\u2019t do. A few days in, I made interesting discoveries: \u201cIt\u2019s because I\u2019m a slow reader\u201d, \u201cthe courses were too advanced and French is not my first language, etc\u201d. But I soon realized those were mere excuses. They were probably what caused the problem ab initio. Digging deeper I had my \u201cah-ah!\u201d moment, uncovering the main problem: self-doubt. Apparently, I wasn\u2019t that unintelligent. After all, I graduated top 3% from my undergraduate studies and top 5% from my first masters. How could I forget these so quickly, only to lose my confidence upon encountering a seemingly challenging situation?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This is how we humans mostly are when life happens. A little challenge and we lose it, forgetting how amazing we are to have come that far in the first place. We even forget our previous exploits to the point that we begin to self-sabotage, empowering hitherto powerless situations. We start telling ourselves stories that only fester things. Most people give in to defeat by caressing negative self-talk that leads to self-imposed limitations. Very few dare to create a virtuous cycle that breaks the vicious cycle by trying to find a solution. I believe you\u2019re in the latter category. Otherwise, you wouldn\u2019t be reading this.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Anyways, I summoned the courage to hope again. This made possible my decision to turn things around in spite of the many reasons I had to believe otherwise. Then I drew a plan, setting a goal of 85% in all subsequent courses. Maybe I was too modest to not target 100%. Or perhaps I wasn\u2019t bold enough to aim that high. Well, being realistic helps, you know! So upon resumption, I perused the course outlines, breaking down the course materials and scores of books by week, culminating in a calendar-based study plan. I also resolved to commence working on assignments and research papers way ahead of deadlines. Then I got to work.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Every day for the first 2 weeks, I studied for 2 hours minimum. That consistency grew my daily study time to 6+ hours within 2 months. Acknowledging I\u2019m a slow reader, I watched and tried hacks from youtube videos on improving my reading speed. In class, I took more notes and re-read them immediately after. I recorded my lecturers and replayed recordings during walkouts and at commute times. I was all in and soaked up! Gradually, I built momentum. As I saw improvement in assignment grades, my confidence grew. It grew so much that my colleagues wondered \u201cwhat\u2019s up\u201d as I unashamedly asked questions upon questions in class. I was catching up really fast and submitted my deliverables on time. Not a surprise that I shut all the way up with 80% becoming a benchmark in courses for that semester and much higher by subsequent ones.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So, what\u2019s that thing you feel helpless or hopeless about? Yours may not be academic and could be a life or career challenge that scares you to death. It might even be financial, relationship or health related. I don\u2019t know the nature of your challenge but whatever it is, it\u2019s not the end. Don\u2019t write things off! There\u2019s help within and around you if you\u2019d muster just a little audacity to hope again. What you want is not out of reach. You are not mediocre, and nothing is beyond fixing. But first, you must believe. You have hope, and you can fix that situation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Now, sit for a moment and ruminate over how far you\u2019ve come. Can you see how much of a hero you are to have come this far? How about you grab a pen and paper right now to make a list of your previous wins\u2013might be how hard you worked to get that job you now hate or how lucky you are to even make it to college. Just go on a reflection spree. You\u2019ll find something; there\u2019s always something. While this may not solve the problem completely, it’s the best place to start. Try it and you\u2019ll see how it\u2019ll help you gradually replace self-doubt with self-belief. And once you feel better, it\u2019s time to take things further!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ask questions: what exactly is wrong? Where am I missing it? This helps you identify things you need to stop doing, start doing, do more of, and do less of. First, make a list of goals. Make sure the goal is specific just like I did in my case. Making it a blend of ambitious and realistic is great too. Then, indicate the actions and timeline against each. There you have your plan!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Remember, goals without action are just dreams. As such, you must execute your plan and review it on the go. Start slowly and grow steadily. It\u2019s okay to miss a day in your action plan. It won\u2019t matter so long as you realign immediately to not lose momentum. Your confidence will rise with your results, astonishing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you believe you can, set goals and take corresponding actions, it\u2019s only a matter of time till your results start to stun you. And when you succeed, some will say you worked hard while others say you were lucky. But you\u2019ll say: \u201cit\u2019s a combination of both although I believed in myself enough to at least try\u201d.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I hope these uplifts you!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

***<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Paul Akingbola<\/em><\/strong> is an entrepreneur, consultant and coach passionate about helping people accelerate growth in life, career and relationships. He is completing his MA French program in the Department of Modern Languages, Literatures and Cultures. <\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

There are divergent views on success. Some say it\u2019s a product of hard work. Some say it\u2019s sheer luck. More recent schools of thought say it\u2019s a combination of both\u2013hard work and luck. That\u2019s well, true. But I believe every success story has something much more important: self-belief. I recall grappling with my academics in … [Read more…]<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":165,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[21,74],"class_list":{"0":"entry","1":"post","2":"publish","3":"author-poakingbola","4":"post-1993","6":"format-standard","7":"category-student-blog","8":"post_tag-grad-life","9":"post_tag-grad-school-success"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp.mun.ca\/studentblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1993","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp.mun.ca\/studentblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp.mun.ca\/studentblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp.mun.ca\/studentblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/165"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp.mun.ca\/studentblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1993"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/wp.mun.ca\/studentblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1993\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2003,"href":"https:\/\/wp.mun.ca\/studentblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1993\/revisions\/2003"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp.mun.ca\/studentblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1993"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp.mun.ca\/studentblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1993"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp.mun.ca\/studentblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1993"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}